Am I going through Menopause? I am only 40. 

by Christie LaValley
     I was only 40 when my period stopped coming.  It was about a year after a sudden tramua in my life.  My girls father had committed suicide and dealing with the stress of making sure my kids got the attention and love they needed. My body seemed out of whack.  About 6 months in I went to the doctors to find out if I was going through the change.  He asked me if I slept.  Having been a heavy sleeper all my life.  My answer was "yes."  He brushed me off and told me I must be stressed.  I was so upset with his answer.  I just paid over a $100 to be brushed off.  
     Frustrated I went to another doctor who did not brush off my question because I was only 40 and slept through the night.  She ran some blood tests.  And  guess what?  I was menopausal. Often your doctor can make the diagnosis of perimenopause and menopause based on your symptoms. Blood tests to check hormone levels may also be beneficial, but they may be difficult to evaluate due to erratic fluctuations of hormones during this period. It may be more helpful to have several tests done at different times for comparison.
       A premature menopause refers to a menopause that occurs prior to age 45.
Additionally, menopause can be induced by chemotherapy, infection, trauma or autoimmune disease. Menopause occurs earlier in smokers and is a result of a smoking related reduction in estrogen levels. Not only had I gone through trauma, but I was diagnosed at the same time with fibromyalgia  and I was a smoker.  I was very angry at my regular doctor for not knowing this and making me think I was crazy.  Do not let your doctor make think you are crazy.  You deserve better from your health care providers.  Seek another doctor like I did and read as much as you can about menopause.    Here is what I learned:

What is Menopause?

       A "natural menopause" generally occurs between the ages of 48-52 and is recognized by cessation of the monthly menstrual cycle. When a woman is born, the  ovaries contain relatively one million follicles, or eggs. At  the age of puberty she has about 600,000 or so still remaining. It is the follicles that are responsible for the natural production of estrogen, the hormone that will assist her physically and mentally into an adult female capable of reproduction. A woman uses up about 1000 of these eggs or follicles every month in this process. The average  f reproductive ability is 400 months at the average age of 48-52.  It is at this time her ovaries exhaust their supply of available eggs. With the absence of these estrogen-producing follicles,  a woman's estrogen levels fall below the levels necessary to trigger ovulation and cause monthly periods
    Perimenopause, or menopause transition, is the stage of a woman's reproductive life that begins several years before menopause, when the ovaries gradually begin to produce less estrogen. It usually starts in a woman's 40s, but has been known to start in a woman's 30s or even earlier.
        Perimenopause lasts up until menopause, the stage when the ovaries actually stop releasing eggs. It is in the last one to two years of perimenopause, this decline in estrogen accelerates. At this point, is  many women will start experiencing menopausal symptoms which are more abundant the perimenopausal symptoms . The average length of perimenopause is about four years, but for some women this period may last only a few months or continue for about 10 years. Perimenopause ends the first year after menopause. This when a woman has gone 12 months without having her period.  You are then consider postmenopausual.

What Are the Signs of Perimenopause?

You may recognize perimenopause when you begin experiencing some or all of the following symptoms:
  • Hot flashes
  • Breast tenderness
  • Worsening of premenstrual syndrome
  • Decreased libido (sex drive)
  • Fatigue
  • Irregular periods
  • Vaginal dryness; discomfort during sex
  • Urine leakage when coughing or sneezing
  • Urinary urgency (a pressing need to urinate more frequently)
  • Mood swings
  • Difficulty sleeping

Irregular periods are very common and normal during perimenopause. However,  other conditions can cause similar abnormalities in menstrual bleeding. If any of the following situations apply to you, you should see a doctor to rule out other causes:
  • Your periods are very heavy, and/or accompanied by blood clots
  • Your periods last several days longer than usual
  • You spot between periods
  • You experience spotting after sex
  • Your periods occur closer together
Other potential causes of abnormal bleeding include hormonal imbalances, birth control pills, pregnancy, fibroids, blood clotting problems or, rarely, cancer.

Many women experience relief from hot flashes after taking low-dose birth control pills for a short period of time or drinking less caffeine.  Lowering my caffeine intake helped me drastically. Other options that may control hot flashes include the birth control skin patch, vaginal ring, and progesterone injections. Certain women should not use birth control hormones,especially if you smoke, so talk to your doctor to see if they are right for you.

What are the other types of Menopause?

A surgical menopause or hysterectomy refers to a menopause that is induced by a surgical removal of the uterus. If the ovaries are removed at the time of surgery the fall in hormone levels of both estrogen and testosterone is sudden and severe. Testosterone plays an important part in maintaining energy levels, sex drive and in a number of other important functions. If the ovaries are not removed, they may continue to function and produce adequate levels of estrogen and testosterone, until the time that a natural menopause would have occurred. However, as it turns out, in as many as 50% of these cases, the retained ovaries cease to function normally within three years after surgery. It's easy to see why a surgical menopause/hysterectomy has a greater potential to disrupt health and the quality of life.

Complete list Menopause symptoms:
    hot flashes
    inability to concentrate
    mood swings
    chest pain
    sore breasts
    irregular/heavy bleeding
    vaginal dryness
    itchy vulva
    loss of sex drive
    slower sexual arousal
    painful intercourse
    abdominal bloating
    irritable bladder
    frequent bladder infection
    frequent urination
    increased facial hair
    thinning hair
    itchy skin
    brittle nails
    pins and needles
    sore muscles
    stiff/swollen joints
    back pain

The Most Important Part of Post-Menopause Life

         Along with the physical changes that occur after menopause, women should improve their health care routines. Since hormones do so much more for us then gives us periods, postmenopausal women are at greater risk for heart disease, so redirect your diet toward low-fat foods and lower your salt intake — this reduces the risk of heart attack and atherosclerosis, a condition in which plaque (cholesterol and other fats) builds up on the insides of the arteries.
    As part of your routine regular check-ups, you should have a blood test at a minimum of every five years until age 50, and then at regular intervals. Your doctor should recommend at what  intervals you should be tested based on how high your cholesterol is, if you are on cholesterol treatment, and on other cardiovascular risk factors that you may have, such as hypertension or obesity. This is serious so do not put it off.
     It is suggested that women  should have their bone density checked once every two years to detect early signs of osteoporosis, a weakening of the bones. It has been shown that postmenopausal women are particularly at risk for this condition. Research has shown that up to 20 percent of bone loss can occur in the first five years of menopause.

          Also, it is suggested that women ages 50 and up should consume at least 1,200 milligrams of calcium every day to maintain their bone health. This can be accomplished with supplements,  and by consuming calcium-rich foods like milk.
        Make sure you take care of yourself and share with other women early the signs of menopause.  Let no woman be left in the dark.  Hormones are hard enough to deal with!

A little on The Root Chakra. 

First - Base -  Root- 
The I Want Chakra *
Muladhara * First Seal

The first Chakra is known by the many names listed above and is the center of physical energy and vitality, the energy to succeed in business or material possessions, and the center of manifestations.
       The Base or Root chakra is located at the very bottom of the spine and governs issues around physical self-preservation.  These issues include survival, security, and safety, as well as primal and erotic sexual urges.
      This chakra is the grounding force which allows is to connect to the earth energies and empower our being. Every other chakra is downstream from this one and only receives the energy that the root chakra can pass through them.  The path to health and mystical power goes directly through the gender organs.  To understand your Root chakra, you must come to a place of peace with your sexual energy.   Throughout the ancient world in historical and mythological stories, the Root chakra has been associated with dragons and snakes.  The dragons is a symbol for the kundalini fire energy.
Quick Facts  on the Root Chakra
Names:  First - Base - Root-  The I Want Chakra- * Muladhara *- First Seal Location: at the tailbone
Color: red/black, Day of week: Monday
Tone: E.     Note: C
Element: Earth,  Planet: Saturn- insufficient matter
Sense: smell, Demon/ emotion: Fear  
  kinesthetic feelings, movement.
Spiritual Lesson: material world lessons. Conquering the flesh for the spirit
Information Stored Inside Root Chakra:
The Root Chakra has stored Information   
     pertaining to familial beliefs, superstitions, loyalty, instincts, physical pleasure
     or pain, touch.
Church: Ephesus,   Beast: Like a calf – animal like
Word in Lord’s prayer: Bread- The food or energy we need

This is the home of the primary 8 cells that have all of the knowledge of creation and remain the only cells in your body that do not change in your lifetime. It grounds us in the physical world.  This chakra is associated with the kidneys, ovaries the teste, the gonads  and the adrenal glands. The associated element is earth. The emotion or “quality” associated with this chakra is the emotion of fear, our animalistic demon .
At this stage it is important to understand that the chakras are seats of consciousness through which we express ourselves. Perhaps we should say, ideally we express ourselves through them, but in most cases we consciously or unconsciously limit expression to but a couple of these centers.
During the first seven years of development, ideally, we express ourselves through this seat of consciousness. We are mainly interested in being fed, nurtured, having our diapers changed and basically surviving. For this reason the base chakra is also often referred to as the survival chakra. The “I want chakra.”  We have all heard children from the time they can cry to about age 7 scream they want something.
As adults, if we continue to healthily express ourselves through this seat of consciousness, we are well grounded people. We are highly motivated because the emotion of fear activates the “flight or fight” response when necessary and gives us our get-up-and-go. We have a good sense of our personal place in relation to the material world and feel somewhat secure within it.
Limited expression through the base chakra is often shows in insecurity when relating to the material world. This may result in violent or extremely greedy behavior. The person will feel generally “ungrounded” and at odds with his/her environment.  Others may feel simply detached from it.
When energy is not flowing freely: from this chakra you might find yourself suffering froms intestinal and stomach gases, constipation, tumors, boils and pimples. The root chakra is responsible for your sense of safety, belonging, and security in the world. The root chakra’s main concern is survival of the self. The health of our blood, immune system, bones, joints and spine are very dependent on the emotions associated with this chakra. It demands the body's basic needs for safety, money, sexuality, groundedness and boundaries. People who have trouble with their first chakra may not have yet discovered their life purpose and developed a strong identity. If they carry with them  too much yin they may be ungrounded. If they are too yang there might an attachment to material things, self-indulgence and a their own needs will become a  preoccupation .
Excessive energy: This energy is egotistical, domineering, selfish and greedy.  The root chakras sexual energy will be entirely genital.  Judgment and biased opinions come from here.
Deficient energy: This energy exhibits a lack of confidence, shows an inability to achieve goals, often brings suicidal feelings and a sense of feeling unlovable.  Having deficient energy in the root lowers interest in sex.  Fear and insecurity also flow from here, anxiety at it finest.  Blockage in this energy center can result in a sense of unworthiness, self-doubt, or shame.  Thought patterns such as “I don’t deserve love”, “I’m ashamed of who I am”, or “I’m always misunderstood” are common in people with a blocked Root chakra.  These people try to compensate for these feelings by acquiring, keeping, and controlling material possessions, and by becoming addicted to material things.  The ultimate Root chakra failure is suicide.
Balanced energy: This energy is centered and grounded.  You feel healthy, fully alive, have unlimited physical energy, and can manifest abundance with ease.  This healthy energy takes good care of the body.  People with open Root chakras love their lives and the physical incarnation of their present bodies.
Mental and Emotional Issues: The Root’s energy is associated with survival, self esteem, social order, security, family.
Illness: Illnesses that are associated with Root chakra failure include drug addiction, anemia, cancer, arthritis, heart disease, gynecological problems, herpes, candida, AIDS and other immune deficiency, lower back pain, and constipation.  There can also be physical problems with the coccyx, anus, and/ or genitals.
Physical Dysfunctions: This energy can cause lower back pain, sciatica, varicose veins, rectal tumors, depression, and immune related disorders.
Area of Body Governed, Glands/Organs:  Spinal column, feet, rectum, immune system, adrenals, kidneys, colon, legs, bones
Root Chakra Exercises: This chakra is truly fed by getting involved in life. If you are not comfortable with the family you were born to, then adopt new families of friends, animals, organizations, support groups, etc. to balance this chakra and make it stronger. Look for evidence that your world is secure.  You can chakracise your root chakra by stomping your feet upon the ground, marching, dancing, playing golf, and doing squats.
Musical instruments/tones feeding the root chakra: Keynote C, Deep-low drums, Bassoon, Primitive drum rolls.
Viewing or wearing the color: red strengthens this chakra.
 Feeding Your Root Chakra:
Grounding foods
·         Root vegetables: carrots, potatoes, parsnips, radishes, beets, onions, garlic, etc.
·         Protein-rich foods: eggs, meats, beans, tofu, soy products, peanut butter
·         Spices: horseradish, hot paprika, chives, cayenne, pepper

Helpful Gems/Minerals:
Bloodstone, Boji Stones, Brass, Carnelian, Cerussite, Coral (Red), Diamonds (all chakras), Elestial, Epidote, Garnet (Green/Red), Hematite, Lodestone, Meteorite, Obsidian, Onyx (Black), Pyrite, Quartz (Clear, Smoky, Tourmalinated and Rutilated), Rhodochrosite, Rhodonite, Ruby, Sapphire, Spinel, Sunstone, Rubellite, Tourmaline (Black and Watermelon), Zoisite, Zircon (all chakras).
Helpful Scents: Patchouli, cedar wood, lavender, musk, hyacinth, cinnamon, sandalwood
How can you balance this chakra?

Dancing is very good for grounding.  In the summer, go barefoot.  House cleaning and cooking is also grounding.  Hug a tree and take care of your plants or your garden. 
Focusing on the color red can help bring your energetic body “down to earth” and in alignment with your physical body. 
Opening this chakra by using colors, scents, and crystals is very effective.

 Positive affirmations for this chakra:
*   I know who I am and make choices based on what I know is right for me.
*   I am supported in life through all my choices to do good and share the light
    of love.

*   My body supports me in living a creative and happy life.
*    I am open to the spirit of life, which carries me beyond my original limits to
     a higher, more creative space.

*    I am thankful for all the opportunities for growth and development that have
     come my way.

*    I am grateful for the challenges that have taught me who I truly am.
*    I love life.

Tantra: When the energies or vibrations from two people’s chakras are mixed, the following takes place: The light from the one chakra affects the light from the other, and these light waves are mixed in a way, so that they create different figures.  The figures created by the light waves from the chakras become more beautiful, the more love there is between the parties.

Kundalini Awakening:According to Wikipedia “Kundalini is described as a sleeping, dormant potential force in the human organism.[6] It is one of the components of an esoteric description of man's 'subtle body', which consists of nadis (energy channels), chakras (psychic centres), prana (subtle energy), and bindu (drops of essence).
Kundalini is described[who?] as being coiled up at the base of the spine, usually within muladhara chakra. The image given[who?] is that of a serpent coiled three and a half times around a smokey grey lingam. Each coil is said[who?] to represent one of the three gunas, with the half coil signifying transcendence.

Through meditation, and various esoteric practices, such as kundalini yoga, laya-yoga,[7] and kriya yoga, Reiki,  the kundalini is awakened, and can rise up through the central nadi, called sushumna, that rises up inside or alongside the spine. The progress of kundalini through the different chakras leads to different levels of awakening and mystical experience, until the kundalini finally reaches the top of the head, Sahasrara chakra, producing an extremely profound mystical experience”


Physical effects are believed to be a sign of kundalini awakening by some,[18] but described as unwanted side effects pointing to a problem rather than progress by others.[17] The following are either common signs of an awakened kundalini or symptoms of a problem associated with an awakening kundalini:
  • Involuntary jerks, tremors, shaking, itching, tingling, and crawling sensations, especially in the arms and legs
  • Energy rushes or feelings of electricity circulating the body
  • Intense heat (sweating) or cold, especially as energy is experienced passing through the chakras
  • Spontaneous pranayama, asanas, mudras and bandhas
  • Visions or sounds at times associated with a particular chakra
  • Diminished sexual desire or a state of constant orgasm
  • Emotional purgings in which particular emotions become dominant for short periods of time.[19]
  • Pressure inside the skull and headache
  • Bliss, feelings of infinite love and universal connectedness, transcendent awareness
A personal experience was described by Brian Van de Horst: he felt an activity at the base of his spine starting to flow so he relaxed and allowed it to happen. A feeling of surging energy began traveling up his back, at each chakra he felt an orgasmic electric feeling like every nerve trunk on his spine beginning to fire. D. R. Butler describes a similar experience accompanied by a wave of euphoria and happiness softly permeating his being. He described the surging energy as being like electricity but hot, traveling from the base of his spine to the top of his head. He also reported that the more he analyzed the experience, the less it occurred.[20]"

Dr Oz on Yoga 


I learned yoga as a young doctor just entering the clinic. As we learned to stay up late into the evenings to care for critically ill patients, I began to use the practice as a tool for centering myself to cope with the reality of patients doing poorly and the fatigue of an academically rigorous program. At 3 a.m., when my patient was bleeding internally and the next transplant was in the holding area of the O.R., positions like down dog freed my mind to meditate on my body and rejuvenate me for the next case. It did not take long to figure out that a practice that benefits the healer might also work for the patient.

Most of us never take a deep breath all day long. The most fundamental practice in yoga is the deep, belly breath through the nose. The diaphragm is a large muscle located just below the lungs that ideally should pull down the lungs during inspiration. This is why young children push their stomach out when sleeping or exercising. Adults need to do the same. To properly exhale, suck your belly button toward your spine to push the diaphragm up and empty all the air from your lungs. This process also brings nitric oxide—not nitrous oxide—from the back of the nose into your lungs, which dilates arteries to bring more oxygen into your body.

Yoga helps clean blood of waste material (through lymphatic stimulation), and trains us to loosen muscles and joints that are ignored in our day-to-day lives. Routines like sun salutation get the blood flowing as we warm up and free our body to experience the new stresses we will face. The practice also gets us to handle the weight of our body more effectively, which builds bone and muscle strength so we are more resilient to the frailty that afflicts many. This is why power yoga practitioners have great bodies.

Finally, yoga gets us to focus our minds on remote parts of our body—like tight joints and muscles—as we gently but firmly deepen into our poses. For people like me, meditation proves difficult because our mind wonders. But if we can concentrate on the tension in our hips as we empty our mind, then we are well on the way.

So here is my routine. It takes me 7 to 10 minutes every morning.

Start your mornings with rejuvenation!

Frankincense and Cancer  

Frankincense and Cancer

     Many people in my family and friend circle have been fighting cancer.  My sister who has been studying edible essential oils brought this wonderful information to me.  This is my research and I do believe that dōTERRA oils are exceptional oils for consumption and their healing properties.  I will soon be selling these myself

     Frankincense trees were once considered extremely valuable during ancient times. Their location was often a matter of national or state secret. Many Egyptians used the incense to fumigate their homes or for ritual incense. They even used thre oil for cosmetics. It was used as a holy anointing oil. It was considered  a general cure-all for all diseases. It was also used to enhance meditation and elevate spiritual consciousness.
     History shows it was used for embalming and as a perfume. It formed an important part of the Sabbath day offering. Frankincense or Olibanum is mentioned in the Scriptures over 50 times and is also found in the books of Exodus, Leviticus, Numbers, Chronicles, Nehemiah, Song of Solomon, Isaiah, Matthew, and Revelations.

In my research I  learned that Frankincense is resin (a.k.a. dried sap)  from the Boswellia tree. The highest quality flows creamy white and is called luban, meaning “milk,”  although the color can vary from soft yellow, to rich amber or even luminous green. It just depends on the season.
The essential oil of frankincense is produced by steam distillation of the tree resin. The oil's chemical components are 75% monoterpenes, sesquiterpenes, monoterpenoles, sesquiterpenols, and ketones. It has a good balsamic sweet fragrance, while the Indian frankincense oil has a very fresh smell. Contrary to recent claims, steam or hydro distilled frankincense oil does not contain any boswellic acid as these components (triterpenoids) are non-volatile and too large to come over in the steam distillation process. The chemistry of the essential oil is mainly monoterpenes and sesquiterpenes with small amounts of diterpenoid components being the upper limit in terms of molecular weight.
 A powder might be better for consumption to benefit from the boswellic acids.

Actions of Frankincense:
The many actions of frankincense include anti-inflammatory, anti-tumoral, immune-stimulant, antidepressant and muscle relaxing. It  also stimulates the limbic system as well as the hypothalamus, pineal and pituitary glands. It is a strong anti-viral, antioxidant, antifungal, antibacterial, antiseptic and expectorant oil. Frankincense has the ability to relax and revitalize at the same time.

Cancer Research Using Frankincense:

There are a few researchers studying the effects of frankincense on various cancers with some degree of success. In vitro, a study done in a glass or test tube, shows inhibition or stimulation of cell proliferation depending on the concentration of frankincense oil in the growth media.
  • A recent study conducted at the University of Oklahoma showed that frankincense can kill bladder cancer cells without harming the surrounding tissue.
  • Studies are showing frankincense to be a strong immune-stimulant with some claiming that frankincense has the ability to repair DNA.
  • A Chinese study conducted in 2000, indicated that Boswellia acids have “anti-carcinogenic and anti-tumor activities.” These boswellic acids from frankincense inhibit “a variety of malignant cells” in people suffering from leukemia and brain tumors.
  • The Cancer Research Institute of the University of Nevada  has also treated cervical cancer with frankincense, in which “there was 72% inhibition and growth of non-cancerous cells.”
  • Other studies have shown thatthe  boswellic acids from frankincense can exert anti-prolifertive activity toward a variety of malignant cells.
  • Another study showed that the boswellic acids are very potent apoptotic agents to cancer cells and  even another one shows that the Boswellic acids from frankincense gum exhibit potent cytotoxic activity against CNS tumors.

Why haven't we heard about this before?
It sounds unbelievable but the anti-cancerous effects of frankincense has been known for thousands of years. Will it work for everyone? Unfortunately, No, but compared to the effects of chemotherapy, frankincense has shown great promise in the past,  for us now and for the future. Frankincense will never be promoted for the breakthrough that it is because there is no money to be made in its promotion. Drug companies will not make money this way getting rid of Chemotherapy.  Though Frankincense is expensive in comparison to other therapeutic grade oils but it is very cheap in comparison to drugs like chemotherapy. Unlike chemotherapy is is relaxing and uplifting instead of deadly, poisoning, and lethargic

    Many scientists have observed and can agree that there is some unknown agent within frankincense which seems to stop cancer spreading and induces cancerous cells to close themselves down. Immunologist Mahmoud Suhail has been quoted "Cancer starts when the DNA code within the cell's nucleus becomes corrupted. It seems frankincense has a re-set function. It can tell the cell what the right DNA code should be.  Somehow, Frankincense separates the 'brain' of the cancerous cell - the nucleus - from the 'body' - the cytoplasm, and closes down the nucleus to stop it reproducing corrupted DNA codes."
     Currently, with chemotherapy, doctors blast the area around a tumor to kill the cancer, but that also kills healthy cells, and weakens the patient bringing them close to death.. Treatment with frankincense could eradicate the cancerous cells alone and let the others live.The task now is to isolate the agent within frankincense which, apparently, works this miraculous function.

History Medical Research (Bosellia serrata)
In Ayurvedic medicine, Indian frankincense known as Boswellia serrata and is commonly referred to as "dhoop," has been used for hundreds of years for treating ailment like arthritis,  the healing  of wounds, strengthening the female hormone system, and purifying the atmosphere from undesirable germs. The use of frankincense in Ayurveda is called "dhoopan". In Indian culture, it is suggested that burning frankincense everyday in your house brings good health and peace to the home..

 The Standardized preparations of Indian frankincense from Boswellia serrata are  currently being investigated in scientific studies as a treatment for many chronic inflammatory diseases such as Crohn's disease, ulcerative colitis, and osteoarthritis. Initial clinical study results have indicated the power or capacity to produce a desired effect when usingincense preparations for Crohn's disease. For therapy trials concering ulcerativecolitis, asthma, and rheumatoid arthritis there are only isolated reports and some pilot studies from which there is not yet  conclusive sufficient evidence of safety and efficacy. Similarly, the long-term effects and side effects of taking frankincense has not yet been scientifically investigated. 
As of May 2008 FASEB Journal announced that Johns Hopkins University and the Hebrew University of Jerusalem have determined that frankincense smoke is a psychoactive drug that relieves depression and anxiety in mice. The researchers found that the chemical compound in Censole Acetate is responsible for the effects.

In a completely different study, an enriched extract of "Indian Frankincense"  was used in a randomized, double-blind, placebo-controlled study of patients with osteoarthritis.  The patients receiving the extract showed significant improvement in their arthritis in as little as seven days. The compound seemed to cause no major adverse effects and, according to the study authors, is safe for human consumption and long-term use. Please beware that the study was funded by a company which produces frankincense extract, and that the results have not yet been duplicated by another study.

 There is approximately 54,000 malignant melanoma cases are diagnosed annually, according to the American Cancer Society, and there are many similarities between malignant melanoma in horses and malignant melanoma in people.

Recognizing this great opportunity for translational research, John Robertson, a professor in the Virginia-Maryland Regional College of Veterinary Medicine at Virginia Tech, has been studying the disease and an experimental treatment involving frankincense oil.

During a recent presentation before a regional meeting of the American Cancer Society in Roanoke, Va., Robertson -- director of the college's Center for Comparative Oncology -- said he's found that Frankincence oil has fairly selective anti-tumor activity and doesn't appear to disrupt normal cells. Robertson said."I think this research on frankincense oil suggests that this ancient medicine may have significant modern uses for chemotherapy of non-resectable malignancies,"

Links to Research:

Recipes for frankincense:

*Very Important 100% pure Frankincense oil should never be consumed “straight,” but should always be diluted. Please read the following article on the side effects (and benefits) of consuming Frankincense essential oils prior to consuming frankincense oil. While their label may say “Not for consumption”, the company Aura Cacia (available at Whole Foods) has stated that (for their products) this has more to do with USDA regulations than the actual safety of the product (assuming that the essential oil is 100% pure boswellia sacra, with no additives). Read the entire article for more information. After reading all this material I felt comfortable serving this dish to my family (as they do in Oman without a second thought). None of us suffered any ill effects. Please make the decision that’s right for your family.

2 1/2 cups milk
1 1/2 cups heavy cream
10-15 drops 100% pure frankincense oil (boswellia sacra), available at health food stores*
or powder more info at
1 cup sugar, divided in half
3 egg yolks
First, whip three golden balls of sunshine (egg yolks) with a 1/2 cup of sugar
You want  the mixture to become thick and soft yellow.
Meanwhile, heat up the milk, cream and remaining sugar in a medium pot.  Slide off the stove right before it reaches a bubble and whisk the hot liquid a little at a time into your egg mixture.
Return to medium-low heat and cook until thickened and the velvety mixture coats the back of a spoon.
Whisk in the frankincense drops to taste and strain. Tip: the oil will want to separate so move quickly to incorporate it (as though you’re making salad dressing). Chill the mixture in an ice bath or overnight in the refrigerator. Churn in an ice cream maker according to manufacturer’s instructions.  or freeze if you do not have one.

Peppermint Essential Oil 

Peppermint Essential Oil

Say “No” to Hot Flashes is simple as 1, 2, 3 and Spray.

It amazing the amount of people, men and women who suffer with hot flashes.  So often we think that only menopausal women suffer from drowning in their sweat behind a beet red face.
The truth is hot flashes are not limited to menopausal women.  Some pregnant women have also experience hot flashes because the hormone changes in the body. Today there is another large sector of people suffering from hot flashes their hot flashes are induced by prescriptions drug, chemo or radiation. Regardless, hot flashes are frustrating and uncomfortable.
My family and I have discovered a quick, simple and affordable remedy for hot flashes.  We feel to compelled to share it with world. The solution is doTerra Peppermint Essential Oil and water added to spray bottle relieves hot flashes within seconds.
My husband, George was diagnosed with cancer and his treatment includes chemo pills and chemo shots administered into his body.  What is one of the side effects of chemo? Yes,hot flashes!  Several times a day he experiences  hot flashes without warning.
George finds the inconveniences of hot flashes are continuously frustrating and uncomfortable; sometimes even embarrassing.  He’s number one complaint with hot flashes are after he showers.  He’s showered, all dressed and ready to go out.  BAM!!!! HOT FLASH! Within seconds George’s fresh clothes and body are soaking in sweat and frustration hits him hard. He turns to me and says, “why do I even bother showering?”.
When I discovered peppermint oil can relief hot flashes I immediately prepared a bottle of doTerra Peppermint Essential Oil for my husband.  When George feels a hot flash coming on he kicks it in the bud with 1-3 sprays on his head and body and within seconds his combats his hot flashes.   The spray bottle of doTerra Peppermint Essential Oil has given George peace of mind to shower and go outside our home without being  embarrassed, frustrated and uncomfortable by hot flashes. 
Hot Flash Mixture Solution:1 -1.5 cups distilled or purified water
6-8 drops doterra peppermint essential oil
add into spray bottle
You can re-adjust the amount of water to oil per your specific needs.  Everyone’s body has a different level of sensitivity and reaction. The mixture I have suggested is a good start. If you find the combination is not working add one more drop and test. If does not work add another drop and test. Continue to do this until you have the perfect blend to combat your  hot flashes. 
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 Peppermint Essential Oil Useful Tips:

Burn yourself …peppermint oil immediately cools the skin
Poison Ivy or oak relief apply to area for quick relief
Relief heart burn or upset stomach
Rub onto temples and back of neck to relief headaches
Aching joints and muscles apply to alleviate pain
Add a sprinkle around doors and window seals or place cotton ball with a drop of peppermint oil throughout your home to deter ants, spiders and cockroaches
Kill Aphids in garden or household plants, spray plants with peppermint and distilled water.
Spray bottle of peppermint oil eliminates moths
Peppermint is antibacterial use spray bottle to abate bacteria whip countertops, floors wash hands and body, or diffuse
Add drop of peppermint oil to water to improve athletic performance
Air freshener for home by diffusing or spray in car and home
Inhale vapors to invigorate and energize yourself
Rub on to bottom of feet, on chest or back when congested from cold, flu or sinus illnesses.
Add to hot chocolate, chocolate cake, brownies or ice cream, etc (most essential oils can not be taken internally. dõTerra can be taken internally)
Stay cool and combat hot flashes  add to water or beverage cool yourself off on a warm/hot day
Mouth freshener add drop  to 4 oz water and gargle
One drop on to tongue will freshen breathe
Apply to feet to to calm anxiety and nervous tension
Motion Sickness apply to wrist and naval
Improve memory recall by diffusing or inhaling
Apply to cold sores for quick relief
Embedded Tick removal- put peppermint on Q-tip, touch it to the tick’s rear
Breath peppermint after a meal to tell your brain you are finished eating 
There is more healing and helpful benefits dõTerra Peppermint Essential Oils has to offer. I do hope you will continue to discover more benefits about this amazing herb with me and others.

Optimal healthy me is knowing when I eliminate toxic exposure I increase my optimal healthy.

Live life Optimal!

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Anxiety Disorder Symptoms - Symptoms you may have when having an "Anxiety Attack or Panic Attack". 

I found this on .  It is a great article.

Anxiety Disorder Symptoms

 Symptoms you may have when having an
"Anxiety Attack or Panic Attack"

It is important when trying to self diagnose to look at all the Anxiety disorder symptoms.  Make sure you take into consideration that a Doctor or physician maybe better able to diagnose your condition. However it is extremely important that you gain knowledge about your anxiety attack disorder to enable you to be aware of your condition and all the symptoms an anxiety can cause. If the disorder is in your teen or child it is extremely important to learn as much as possible about teen stress and other teen related disorders. Awareness and diagnosing is one of the first things needed before a cure can be sought after and found.

Sign and Symptom of an Anxiety Disorder- Look at some of the symptoms below and if you have to create a list of some of the most common symptoms you or your loved ones face on a daily basis then do so. Keeping a written record will help aid you to best combat any anxiety that may come about.

If It is your Teen or Child having an Anxiety you may want to check out the article that is written more about a Teen or young Child. If you are trying to get to the root cause of your child's stress or anxiety then take a look at Anxiety Teen Cause. If your just trying to find out what other symptoms they may have then look at Teen and Child Symptoms.

01)Heavy and out of control Breathing

It's hard to breathe as you feel your gasping for air with your lungs not satisfied by the amount of air your taking in. Your quickly trying to almost in a panic to breathe quicker. Many people face this symptom with their anxiety and disorders.

02)Smothering or shortness of breath

Quick short breathes usually very rapid as panic and feeling of being out of control sets in.

03)Feeling of not being able to breathe in enough air

Satisfaction for proper breathing is not achieved as your feeling unable to breathe correctly. Often this causes the quick short breathes.

04)Rapid heart beat, pounding in chest, possible chest pains

You feel your heartbeat throughout your chest as if it is trying to jump out. Some people think their having a heart attack as the pain feels real and can be very frightening. You may also feel in your neck and other vessels the quick fast pumping of blood.

05)palpitations or heart feeling as if it is not beating correctly

Sometimes skipping a beat or off rhythm the heart seems to jump or even skip a beat. Some people may feel a short pause in beating and it is very frightening. Anytime this happens it is a good idea to get checked out by your doctor or ER room. In most cases there is no major problem or ill lasting effect.Try to relax and slow your breathing as you breathe very deep and long.

06)Sweating and feeling clammy

Skin will feel cold and clammy and cool to a breeze. Usually you will look a little pale and may feel a bit green. Hands and palms maybe sticky and heavy sweating usually follows almost as with fever.

07)Indigestion and stomach gas with possible reflux

Some people get sick to their stomachs and the acid build up can cause gas, reflux, and a burning sensation in throat. Often harsh pains can be felt from this in upper chest area which is caused by gas.

08)Shaking out of control

The body loses control as the mind shuts down certain controls to face the fear or hide from it. This is the way it decided to cope with the assumed threat leaving the body to shake and tremble without control.
It is very frightening to go through and for others who witness this when it occurs.

09)Nausea, turning green in feeling with skin pale like

This goes along with that clammy feeling and usually it doesn't last but several minutes before it ceases. No long term affects to worry about and is not that frightening.

10)abdominal pains and queasiness

Ah the magic of stomach gas and the pains it can cause. Makes you feel sick and can almost feel as if your having a heart attack.

11)Dizzy feeling like ready to pass out

Light headed and feeling of losing your balance. You feel as if your going to pass out and some people do. Again the mind deals with situations different ways as it shuts down and almost like reboots it again shortly after. This can last seconds to even several minutes.

12)Light headed and the Feeling your not yourself(unreal)

Weird feeling almost as if your leaving your body with no control in some cases. You may feel like you are about to pass out.

13)Immediate need for urination or defecation

Not as common but common enough to mention. Some people lose control of these functions and may have to urinate right away.

14)Having the feeling and fear of losing it (losing Control)

For people who have been through a panic attack before they maybe feeling as if ones coming on. Just the thought and fear of it may actually make the attack occur.

15)Possible emotional out bursts and frustrations

Screaming, yelling and outbursts as the anxiety attack or panic attack happens. There maybe bad words yelled out or even things that don't make any sense at all.

Anxiety Patient Advocate

Anxiety Books that Help
This book was designed from the patients view and offers insight to whats working for them. It helps as the objective opinion is that of someone suffering from the same or similar condition that you have. The patients in this book go over some of the most medical problems that they have including terminology.
Hundreds of questions and answers, opinions come directly from those who suffer from anxiety. See how people just like you have approached their condition and learned better methods for controlling and curing their anxieties. For many of us the Technical words themselves from Doctors can leave us confused. This book sheds some light and speaks on a level that is understandable. It is a 154 page book that will open your eyes to your condition, understanding, and give you direction to tackling your anxieties.

Anxiety Attack Symptoms

Books on Anxiety can help you so please take up a good reading habit to help yourself or to help the ones you love. Knowledge is power, so as soon as you know all you can then and only then will you be able to understand anxieties, stress and depression, and how to manage and cure the Mental Health Concern.
Not everyone who has anxiety conditions suffer from attacks but those who do can face attacks that can affect their abilities and leave them in a very emotional state and helpless as if paralyzed. Anxiety Attacks come about by triggers and usually when the trigger is discovered most attacks can be avoided and possibly even cured.
If your suffering from Anxiety Attacks or conditions you may want to start taking notes that are very detailed about how you feel, what happened to cause the attack, and be sure to put it all down into a personal journal, When you start following and tracking your anxiety symptoms and discovering the triggers that cause your attacks you will empower yourself to make a difference and cure those fears, phobias, and conditions that have left you powerless.
You may have Mild Anxiety Attack Symptoms such as shortness of breathe, feelings of being overwhelmed, or just weak and need to sit down and relax. Many people suffer from these more mild conditions but if not watched closely they can turn into a major anxiety attack. Don't treat your condition lightly as going untreated can cause you major problems in your future. Just like when you have a cut on your hand you know the chance of infection is possible so you clean the wound, put on some antibiotic cream, and then place a clean bandage on it. The same is true with your anxieties as you should treat them with care and keep an eye on them.

Know your Symptoms

Your anxiety which is often caused by stressful situations will exert symptoms of differing kinds. What you need to learn is what all your symptoms are big and small and the triggers that initiate each one of them. Often one symptom is triggered by something specific, while others are triggered by something totally different. Keep a log any time you have an attack, or an anxiety and be prepared to write the symptom down shortly after it occurs along with the trigger that set it off.
By knowing your symptoms along with the associated triggers you can be taking the first steps in finding a natural cure for your condition. Some of the symptoms we overlook are "Fatigue". Fatigue tends to drag us down and sucks the energy right out of us. Learn more about Fatigue

Symptoms of a Spiritual Awakening 

As promised I found the Symptoms of Spiritual Awakening.  Give yourself a break.  All of this will pass.   Healing sometimes takes time.  

Great youtube video: 

Symptoms of Spiritual Awakening
by Annarita
  1. Changing sleep patterns: restlessness, hot feet, waking up two or three times a night. Feeling tired after you wake up and sleepy off and on during the day. There is something called the Triad Sleep Pattern that occurs for many: you sleep for about 2-3 hours, wake up, go back to sleep for another couple of hours, wake again, and go back to sleep again. For others, the sleep requirements have changed. You can get by on less sleep. Lately I have been experiencing huge waves of energy running into my body from the crown. It feels good, but it keeps me awake for a long time, then subsides. Advice: Get used to it. Make peace with it and don't worry about getting enough sleep (which often causes more insomnia). You will be able to make it through the day if you hold thoughts of getting just what you need. You can also request your Higher Power to give you a break now and then and give you a good, deep night's sleep. If you can't go back to sleep right away, use the waking moments to meditate, read poetry, write in your journal or look at the moon. Your body will adjust to the new pattern.
  2. Activity at the crown of the head: Tingling, itching, prickly, crawling sensations along the scalp and/or down the spine. A sense of energy vibrating on top of the head, as if energy is erupting from the head in a shower. Also the sensation of energy pouring in through the crown, described as "sprinkles". This may also be experienced as pressure on the crown, as if someone is pushing his/her finger into the center of your head. As I mentioned in #1, I have been experiencing huge downloads of energy through the crown. In the past, I have felt more generalized pressure, as if my head is in a gentle vise. One man related that his hair stood on end and his body was covered with goosebumps. Advice: This is nothing to be alarmed about. What you are experiencing is an opening of the crown chakra. The sensations mean that you are opening up to receive divine energy.
  3. Sudden waves of emotion. Crying at the drop of a hat. Feeling suddenly angry or sad with little provocation. Or inexplicably depressed. Then very happy. Emotional roller coaster. There is often a pressure or sense of emotions congested in the heart chakra (the middle of the chest). This is not to be confused with the heart, which is located to the left of the heart chakra. Advice: Accept your feelings as they come up and let them go. Go directly to your heart chakra and feel the emotion. Expand it outward to your all your fields and breathe deeply from the belly all the way up to your upper chest. Just feel the feeling and let it evaporate on its own. Don't direct the emotions at anyone. You are cleaning out your past. If you want some help with this, say out loud that you intend to release all these old issues and ask your Higher Power to help you. You can also ask Grace Elohim to help you release with ease and gentleness. Be grateful that your body is releasing these emotions and not holding onto them inside where they can do harm. One source suggests that depression is linked to letting go of relationships to people, work, etc. that no longer match us and our frequencies. When we feel guilty about letting go of these relationships, depression helps us medicate that pain.
  4. Old "stuff" seems to be coming up, as described above, and the people with whom you need to work it out (or their clones) appear in your life. Completion issues. Or perhaps you need to work through issues of self-worth, abundance, creativity, addictions, etc. The resources or people you need to help you move through these issues start to appear. Advice: Same as #3. Additionally, don't get too involved in analyzing these issues. Examining them too much will simply cycle you back through them over and over again at deeper and deeper levels. Get professional help if you need to and walk through it. Do not try to avoid them or disassociate yourself from them. Embrace whatever comes up and thank it for helping you move ahead. Thank your Higher Power for giving you the opportunity to release these issues. Remember, you don't want these issues to stay stuck in your body.
  5. Changes in weight. The weight gain in the US population is phenomenal. Other people may be losing weight. We often gain weight because many fears we have suppressed are now coming up to the surface to be healed. We react by building up a defense. We also attempt to ground ourselves or provide bulk against increasing frequencies in our bodies. Advice: Don't freak out, but just accept it as a symptom of where you are right now. You will release/gain the weight when all your fears have been integrated. Release your anxiety about this. Then you might find it easier to lose/gain the weight eventually. Exercise. Before eating, try this: Sit at the table with an attractive place setting. Light a candle. Enjoy how the food looks. Place your dominant hand over your heart and bless the food. Tell your body that you are going to use the food to richly nourish it, but that you are not going to use the food to fulfill your emotional hungers. Then pass your hand from left to right over the food and bless it. You may notice that the food feels warm to your hand even if the food is cold-- I like to think that the food is good for me when it feels warm and nourishing to my hand. I have also noticed that when I practice blessing the food, I don't eat as much. It is important not to let yourself off the hook when you forget to bless the food before you eat. If I've forgotten and I've nearly finished eating, I bless the food anyway. That way I don't slip out of the habit. Another thing you can do is to stay present while eating -- don't watch TV or read. Heartily enjoy what blessings are before you.
  6. Changes in eating habits: Strange cravings and odd food choices. Some find they are not as hungry as they used to be. Or hungrier. Advice: Don't deny what your body tells you it needs. If you are not sure, you might try muscle-testing before you chose a food to see if it's what your body wants. Also try blessing the food as described in #5.
  7. Food intolerances, allergies you never had before: As you grow more spiritual, you are more sensitive to everything around you. Your body will tell you what it can no longer tolerate, as if it, too, is sloughing off what doesn't serve it anymore. You might be cleansing yourself of toxins. Some people find they often have a white residue in their mouth, much like that of runners at the end of a race. Advice: An acupuncturist told me that this film can be removed by sloshing 2 tablespoons of cold-pressed olive oil in your mouth for 10-15 minutes (don't swallow, whatever you do), then spitting it out into the toilet -- not the sink, for you just removed toxins from your body and don't want them in the sink. Brush your teeth and do the same. Then clean your brush. (Sorry this is yukky, but it works.)
  8. Amplification of the senses. Increased sensitivity. 8a. Sight: Blurry vision, shimmering objects, seeing glittery particles, auras around people, plants, animals, and objects. Some report seeing formerly opaque objects as transparent. When you close your eyes, you no longer see darkness, but redness. You may also see geometric shapes or brilliant colors and pictures when eyes are closed. Colors appear more vivid -- the sky might look teal or the grass an amazing green. Often I see grids running across the ground. As you become more sensitive, you may see shapes or outlines in the air, especially when the room is almost dark. When your eyes are open or closed, you may see white shapes in your peripheral vision (these are your guides). Advice: Your vision is changing in many ways -- you are experiencing new ways of seeing. Be patient. Whatever you do, do not be afraid. Hazy vision maybe relieved by yawning. 8b. Hearing: Increased or decreased hearing. I once thought I would have to pull off the road because of the painfully amplified sound of my tires on the freeway. Other symptoms are hearing white noise in the head, beeps, tones, music or electronic patterns. Some hear water rushing, bees buzzing, whooshing, roaring or ringing. Others have what is called audio dyslexia-- you can't always make out what people are saying, as if you can no longer translate your own language. Some hear strange voices in their dreams, as if someone is hovering near them. You can either ask the presence(s) to leave or ask Archangel Michael to take care of the situation. Again, there is nothing to fear. Advice: Surrender to it. Let it come through. Listen. Your ears are adjusting to new frequencies. 8c. Enhanced senses of smell, touch, and/or taste. I notice I can now smell and taste chemical additives in some foods in a rather unpleasant manner. Other food may taste absolutely wonderful. For some people, these enhancements are both delightful and distracting. You might even smell the fragrance of flowers now and then. Many of the mystics did. Enjoy it.
  9. Skin eruptions: Rashes, bumps, acne, hives, and shingles. Anger produces outbreaks around the mouth and chin. I had a dermatitis on my extremities for several months that accompanied healing an episode from my past. When I had worked through most of the issue, the condition was released. Advice: You may be sloughing off toxins and bringing emotions to the surface. When there is an issue to be released and you are trying to repress it, your skin will express the issue for you until you process the emotions. Work through your "stuff".
  10. Episodes of intense energy which make you want to leap out of bed and into action. Followed by periods of lethargy and fatigue. The fatigue usually follows great shifts. This is a time of integration, so give into it. Advice: Roll with the nature of the energy. Don't fight it. Be gentle with yourself. Take naps if you are tired. Write your novel if you are too energized to sleep. Take advantage of the type of energy.
  11. Changes in prayer or meditation. Not feeling the same sensations as before. Not having the same experience of being in contact with Spirit. Difficulty in focusing. Advice: You may be in more instant and constant communion with Spirit now and the sensation may therefore be altered. You will adapt to this new feeling. You are actually thinking and acting in partnership with Spirit most of the time now. You may find your meditation periods shorter.
  12. Power surges: All of a sudden you are heated from head to toe. It is a momentary sensation, but uncomfortable. In contrast, some people have felt inexplicably cold. I have experienced both. More recently I experience waves or currents of energy rolling through me. Sometimes the energy seems so intense when it first comes into my body that I feel a little nauseated. But if I think of the energy as divine and let go of fear, I feel wonderful and enjoy the sensation. If you are an energy worker, you may have noticed that the heat running through your hands has increased tremendously. This is good. Advice: If you are uncomfortable, ask your Higher Power, that if it be for your best and highest good, to turn down/up the temperature a bit.
  13. A range of physical manifestations: Headaches, backaches, neck pains, flu-like symptoms (this is called vibrational flu), digestive problems, muscular spasms or cramps, racing heartbeat, chest pains, changes in sexual desire, numbness or pain in the limbs, and involuntary vocalizations or bodily movements. Some of us have even had old conditions from childhood reappear briefly for healing. Advice: Remember what I said about seeking medical help if you need it! If you have determined that this is not a medical condition, relax in the realization that it is only temporary.
  14. Looking younger. Yippee! As you clear emotional issues and release limiting beliefs and heavy baggage from the past, you are actually lighter. Your frequency is higher. You love yourself and life more. You begin to resemble the perfect you that you really are.
  15. Vivid dreams. Sometimes the dreams are so real that you wake up confused. You may even have lucid dreams in which you are in control. Many dreams may be mystical or carry messages for you. And in some dreams, you just know that you are not "dreaming" -- that what is happening is somehow real. Advice: You will remember what is important for you to remember. Don't force anything. Above all, stay out of fear.
  16. Events that completely alter your life: death, divorce, change in job status, loss of home, illness, and/or other catastrophes -- sometimes several at once! Forces that cause you to slow down, simplify, change, re-examine who you are and what your life means to you. Forces that you cannot ignore. Forces that cause you release your attachments. Forces that awaken your sense of love and compassion for all.
  17. A desire to break free from restrictive patterns, life-draining jobs consumptive lifestyles, and toxic people or situations. You feel a compelling need to "find yourself" and your life purpose -- now! You want to be creative and free to be who you really are. You might find yourself drawn to the arts and nature. You want to unclutter yourself from things and people that no longer serve you. Advice: Do it!
  18. Emotional and mental confusion: A feeling that you need to get your life straightened out--it feels like a mess. But at the same time you feel chaotic and unable to focus. See #45. Advice: Put your ear to your heart and your own discernment will follow.
  19. Introspection, solitude and loss of interest in more extroverted activities: This stage has come as a surprise to many extraverts who formerly saw themselves as outgoing and involved. They say, "I don't know why, but I don't like to go out as much as before."
  20. Creativity bursts: Receiving images, ideas, music, and other creative inspirations at an often overwhelming rate. Advice: At least record these inspirations, for Spirit is speaking to you about how you might fulfill your purpose and contribute to the healing of the planet.
  21. A perception that time is accelerating. It seems that way because you have had so many changes introduced into your life at an unprecedented rate. The number of changes seems to be growing. Advice: Breaking your day up into appointments and time segments increases the sense of acceleration .You can slow time down by relaxing into the present moment and paying attention to what's at hand, not anticipating what's ahead. Slow down and tell yourself that you have plenty of time. Ask your Higher Power to help you. Keep your focus on the present. Try to flow from one activity to the next. Stay tuned to your inner guidance. You can also warp time by asking for it. Next time you feel rushed, say, "Time warp, please. I need some more time to -----." Then relax.
  22. A sense of impendingness. There is a feeling that something is about to happen. This can create anxiety. Advice: There is nothing to worry about. Things are definitely happening, but anxiety only creates more problems for you. All your thoughts -- positive or negative-- are prayers. There is nothing to fear.
  23. Impatience. You know better, but sometimes you can't help it. You want to get on with what seems to be coming your way. Uncertainty is not comfortable. Advice: Learn to live with the uncertainty, knowing that nothing comes to you until you are ready. Impatience is really a lack of trust, especially trust in your Higher Power. When you focus on the present, you will experience miracles -- yes, even in traffic.
  24. A deep yearning for meaning, purpose, spiritual connection, and revelation. Perhaps an interest in the spiritual for the first time in your life. "Constant craving", as k.d. lang says. The material world cannot fulfill this longing. Advice: Follow your heart and the way will open up for you.
  25. A feeling that you are somehow different. A disquieting sense that everything in your life feels new and altered, that you have left your old self behind. You have. You are much greater than you can possibly imagine. There is more to come.
  26. "Teachers" appear everywhere with perfect timing to help you on your spiritual journey: people, books, movies, events, Mother Nature, etc. Teachers may appear to be negative or positive when you are trapped in polarity thinking, but, from a transcendent perspective, they are always perfect. Just what you need to learn from and move on. By the way, we never get more than we are ready to master. Each challenge presents us with an opportunity to show our mastery in passing through it.
  27. You find a spiritual track that makes sense to you and "speaks to you" at the most profound levels. Suddenly you are gaining a perspective that you would never have considered before. You hunger to know more. You read, share with others, ask questions, and go inside to discover more about who you are and why you are here
  28. You are moving through learning and personal issues at a rapid pace. You sense that you are "getting it" quite readily. Advice: Keep remembering that things will come to you when they are ready to be healed. Not sooner. Deal with whatever comes up with courage and you will move through the issues rapidly.
  29. Invisible presences. Here is the woo-woo stuff. Some people report feeling surrounded by beings at night or having the sensation of being touched or talked to. Often they will wake with a start. Some also feel their body orbed vibrate. The vibrations are caused by energetic changes after emotional clearing has taken place. Advice: This is a sensitive topic, but you may feel better blessing your bed and space around it before you sleep. I rest assured that I am surrounded only by the most magnificent spiritual entities and am always safe in God's care. Sometimes, however, the fear gets to me, and I call in Archangel Michael and/or Archangel Uriel. I don't beat myself up for being afraid sometimes. I forgive myself for not always sovereign at 3:00 a.m.
  30. Portents, visions, "illusions", numbers, and symbols: Seeing things that have spiritual importance for you. Noticing how numbers appear synchronistically in your awareness. Everything has a message if you take the time to look. I enjoy the experience of "getting the messages." What fun!
  31. Increased integrity: You realize that it is time for you to seek and speak your truth. It suddenly seems important for you to become more authentic, more yourself. You may have to say "no" to people whom you have tried to please in the past. You may find it intolerable to stay in a marriage or job or place that doesn't support who you are. You may also find there is nowhere to hide, no secrets to keep anymore. Honesty becomes important in all your relationships. Advice: Listen to your heart. If your guidance tells you not to do something, speak up and take action. Say "no". Likewise, you must also say "yes" to that which compels you. You must risk displeasing others without guilt in order to attain spiritual sovereignty.
  32. Harmony with seasons and cycles: You are becoming more tuned to the seasons, the phases of the moon and natural cycles. More awareness of your place in the natural world. A stronger connection to the earth.
  1. Electrical and mechanical malfunctions: When you are around, lightbulbs flicker, the computer locks up, or the radio goes haywire. Advice: Call on your angels, guides, or Grace Elohim to fix it or put up a field of protection of light around the machine. Surround your car with bluelight. Laugh.
  2. Increased synchronicity and many small miracles. Look for more of these. Advice: Synchronistic events tell you if you are heading in the right direction or making the correct choices. Honor these clues and you cannot go astray. Spirit uses synchronicity to communicate to you. That's when you begin to experience daily miracles. See #30.
  3. Increased intuitive abilities and altered states of consciousness: Thinking of someone and immediately hearing from them. More synchronicities. Having sudden insights about patterns or events from the past. Clairvoyance, out-of-body experiences, and other psychic phenomena. Intensified sensitivity and knowing. Awareness of one's essence and that of others. Channeling angelic and Christ-consciousness energies.
  4. Communication with Spirit. Contact with angels, spirit guides, and other divine entities. Channeling. More and more people seem to be given this opportunity. Feeling inspiration and downloading information that takes form as writing, painting, ideas, communications, dance, etc.
  5. A sense of Oneness with all. A direct experience of this Wholeness. Transcendent awareness. Being flooded with compassion and love for all life. Compassionate detachment or unconditional love for all is what lifts us up to higher levels of consciousness and joy.
  6. Moments of joy and bliss. A deep abiding sense of peace and knowing that you are never alone.
  7. Integration: You become emotionally, psychologically, physically, and spiritually stronger and clearer. You feel as if you are in alignment with your Higher Self.
  8. Living your purpose: You know you are finally doing what you came to earth for. New skills and gifts are emerging, especially healing ones. Your life/work experiences are now converging and starting to make sense. You are finally going to use them all. Advice: Listen to your heart. Your passion leads you to where you must go. Go within and ask your Higher Power, "What is it you would have me do?" Watch for synchronicities. Listen.
  9. Feeling closer to animals and plants. To some people, animals now seem to be more "human" in their behavior. Wild animals are less afraid. Plants respond to your love and attention more than ever. Some may even have messages for you.
  10. Seeing beings of other dimensions. The veil between dimensions is thinner, so it is not surprising. Just stay in your sovereignty. You are more powerful than you can ever imagine, so do not entertain fear. Ask your guides for help if you slip into fear.
  11. Seeing a person's true form or seeing loved ones with a different face -- past life or parallel life.
  12. Physically manifesting thoughts and desires more quickly and efficiently. Advice: Monitor your thoughts. All thoughts are prayers. Be careful what you ask for.
  13. Left -brain fogginess. Your psychic abilities, your intuitive knowing, your feeling and compassion, your ability to experience your body, your visioning, your expressiveness all emanate from the right brain. In order for this side of the brain to develop more fully, the left brain must shut down a little bit. Normally the left-hemisphere's capacity for order, organization, structure, linear sequencing, analysis, evaluation, precision, focus, problem-solving, and mathematics dominate our often less-valued right brain. What results are memory lapses, placing words in the wrong sequence, inability or no desire to read for very long, inability to focus; forgetting what you are just about to say; impatience with linear forms of communication (audio or written formats); a feeling of spaciness, being scattered; losing interesting research or complex information; feeling bombarded with words and talk and information; and a reluctance to write. Sometimes you feel dull and have no interest in analysis, lively intellectual discussion, or investigation. On the other hand, you might find yourself drawn to the sensate: videos, magazines with photos, beautiful artwork, movies, music, sculpting, painting, being with people, dancing, gardening, walking, and other kinesthetic forms of expression. You may search for spiritual content, even science fiction. Advice: You may discover that if you allow your heart and your right brain to lead you, the left will then be activated appropriately to support you. And someday we will be well-balanced, using both hemispheres with mastery.
  14. Dizziness. This occurs when you are ungrounded. Perhaps you have just cleared a big emotional issue and your body is adjusting to your "lighter" state. Advice: Ground yourself by eating protein. Sometimes "comfort food" feels right. Don't make any food right or wrong for you. Use your guidance to know what you need at any given moment. Take your shoes off and put your feet in the grass for a couple of minutes.
  15. Falling, having accidents, breaking bones. Your body is not grounded or perhaps your life is out of balance. Or your body may be telling you to slow down, examine certain aspects of your life, or heal certain issues. There is always a message. When I recently broke my ankle, I understand that my ankle was taking on what I myself refused to deal with. And that was all of the above. Advice: Stay grounded by taking your shoes off and putting your feet in the grass; even better, lie down on the grass without a blanket under you. Feel the earth beneath you. Get out in nature. Slow down and pay attention. Be mindful about what you are doing. Feel your feelings when they come up. Stay in the present. Surround yourself with blue light when you are feeling shaky.
  16. Heart palpitations. A racing heart usually accompanies a heart opening. It only lasts for a few moments and means that the heart is re-balancing itself after an emotional release. I had one episode that terrified me: I woke up in the middle of the night, my heart pounding. I thought it was going to come right out of my chest. It only happened once and was, I understand, a huge heart-chakra opening. But I did check it out. There is nothing wrong with my heart. Advice: Remember what I said about getting medical attention when needed. Consult your doctor about any conditions you are not comfortable with.
  17. Faster hair and nail growth. More protein is being used in the body. Too bad we can't tell the body where to grow the hair and where not to grow it. (Or can we? Hmmm.)
  18. A desire to find your soulmate or twin flame. More than ever before, the idea that we can have a relationship that matches who we are seems more desirable. Advice: The truth is, we have to be the kind of person we want to attract. We have to love ourselves and where we are right now before we can attract a more "perfect" mate. The work begins at home. Here is how I think it works: Hold the desire for this person in your heart, but without attachment. Expect that someday you will meet someone who is more suited to you, but let go of any expectations as to who this will be and how it will happen. Focus instead on cleaning up your own life and being the kind of person you want to be. Be happy now. Enjoy your life. Then you may see.....
  19. Memories surface. Body memories, suppressed memories, images of past lives and/or parallel lives. We are healing and integrating all our "selves", so expect to have some of these experiences. Advice. Keep in mind that it is best to recall what only what comes to mind, leave the rest alone, don't analyze everything to death (because you will be stuck in the tape loop of infinite issues to process), and feel your feelings as they come up. Ask for help from your guides.
Note: This document may be shared, but please send it in its entirety. Thanks. Love and hugs, Annarita

Episode 13, Sex Etiquette 101 

 Sex Etiquette
By Christie LaValley for Under the Covers on
***This is in no way is an ad for sex.  These are suggestions for your personal life, not for office visits.

     One of the most important things that we could possibly discuss is Sexual Etiquette.   Following the Golden Rule (Do unto others as you would have them do unto you) is a good start, but considering that Sex is very personal and quite diverse amongst individuals, the Golden Rule is just not enough.  I think this is a great topic to discuss.  Due to its great diversity the show will be done in two parts.    Enjoy.

Below you will find many blurbs taken from around the internet with their links.  I did not feel edited them would show the diversity of thought.  I would like you to explore sexual etiquette for yourself and make your own opinion of what is right.

This was adapted by a college as a guideline for its students.

1. Never, never use force. It is never the thing to do. Not if you are married; not if you have previously agreed to have sex; not if all clothes are off. It’s OK to say “NO WAY.” At any point in a sexual relationship, either individual has the right to say, “I think we should stop.”
2. Respect the right of another person to say “no.” When a person says “no” he/she is not saying, “Try harder so I can feel swept away.” When a person feels he/she has gone far enough, it is not an invitation to be seduced.
3. Do unto others, as you would have them do unto you. Always ask the question: “Would I want someone to do this to me, to my sister, to my brother or to a friend?”
4. A couple should recognize that public expression of sexual intimacy might embarrass or offend others. [Get a room!] When expressing oneself sexually, one must respect the sensitivities of others. Your sexual orientation has no bearing on this.
5. It is usually not appropriate to talk about an intimate sexual relationship with a third party. Bragging about sexual conquests can cause a great deal of pain and hurt feelings.
6. Parents should respect the needs of their children for privacy with regard to what they are doing sexually. Similarly, children should respect their parents’ needs for privacy in this area. Parents and their children may choose to bring into a conversation a given sexual experience but this should not be an expectation. Generally, no pressure should be placed on a parent or child to reveal information about intimate sexual relationships.
7. Both partners in a dating relationship should be prepared to accept responsibility for their actions. Before intercourse both partners should ask themselves, “How would I feel and what would I expect if …..?” The consequences of a sexual relationship (sexually transmitted diseases [STD], pregnancy, and/or long-term issues like pelvic pain and infertility) often fall more heavily on the woman involved. But again, sexual orientation has no exclusive bearing on this.
8. Never Negotiate Naked
9. Given the serious potential consequences of sexual intercourse, it is appropriate to inquire about infections a potential partner might have at the present time or might have had in the past.
10. It is also appropriate to speak openly about contraception prior to intercourse.
11. It is appropriate for one partner to contribute money toward contraceptive supplies, STD treatment and exams or clinical visits.
12. It is often important for an individual to communicate to his or her partner just what one prefers to do or to have done – just what causes pleasure and what causes discomfort. Communication is the key to a healthy sexual relationship.
13. Sexual harassment is not a joke. Women especially view harassment as intrusive, thoughtless, insensitive and a violation of their personhood. However, it doesn’t matter if you are male or female, gay or straight, it is still inappropriate.

Adapted from Sexual Etiquette 101 by Dr. Robert A. Hatcher and with material from San Diego State University
These were a few interesting points from

3. You need to disclose that you have an STD
Many people with STDs fear that they’ll be rejected if they share their status with a partner. That anxiety can lead men and women to keep mum about their STD, figuring that they don’t have to volunteer the information if their partners don’t inquire.

4. He goes limp
This happens to every guy, but it’s still an awkward moment. Unless deflated sails are an ongoing problem, don’t make a big thing about it – he’s acutely aware of what just happened. And delving into the psychology of why he’s suddenly gone flat and what it means is only going to make the situation worse.

Due to the fact that Wiccan’s often participate in sexual activity as part of their ceremonies this was written for Pagan events, but applies to everyday life
·  There's nothing wrong with flirting, but be sure to respect boundaries. If the person you're flirting with makes it clear they are with someone else, watch your step. No one wants to get a reputation as a creeper who's putting the moves on everything with a pulse.
·  Much like nudity, touching isn't necessarily a sexual invitation. Many Pagans are comfortable with hugging, massage, holding hands, and lap-sitting. That doesn't mean they want to have sex with you, or with anyone else, it just means they're comfortable with these things. If you're not sure what someone's boundaries are, ask them.
·  There's nothing wrong with recreational sex, as long as all parties involved understand that it's recreational. Also, make sure any sex you have at all is safe sex. Use condoms. If you don't have one, ask around - someone will have a spare.
·  Be considerate of the people you're not having sex with. No one wants to walk past your tent and hear you howling Yeah baby yeah baby yeah! in the throes of passion. Keep it discreet.

Ever have a man explode all over you leaving you there while he goes takes a shower.  He should read:
Ejaculation Etiquette
  • What You Need To Know
  • You must get her permission before climaxing anywhere besides in a condom.
  • Since it comes from you, it's your responsibility to clean it up.
  • If you ejaculate on her body, don't rub it in after the fact.
I found this man’s point of view interesting, but I would have to disagree with some of what he states to be good guidelines.
It's probably not healthy to get into bed with someone with a list of dos and don'ts in your head. Most of these situations depend on the chemistry between two different people, and there are many other variables. But we all know that I'm not particularly "healthy" in the realm of dating, so I developed a list of dos and dont's in bed:
Don't Try to Give Me a Hand Job
There are few things that I'm an expert in, but pleasing myself with my hand is one of them. Any girl who attempts to manipulate my apparatus is at a disadvantage. Hand jobs were awesome in 9th grade, when getting it touched was new, and I was a mere novice in the realm of autoerotica. If you are brazen enough to try it, please take your rings off! A gentle touch is fun, but not a hand job. In the case of hand jobs, I like to drive.
Do Have a Sense of Humor
It keeps things lighthearted and relaxed.
Don't Tell Me to Make You Feel a Certain Way
I wish I could just do without thinking. My overactive brain prevents me from giving in to my animal instincts. Now when a girl is like: "Make me feel this way, NOW..." during pillow talk, I'm just like: "Wow, I don't think I can do that." I'm definitely not a pro, and I don't like being put on the spot. So, I'm reminded of The Smiths' "Pretty Girls Make Graves" when I'm with a girl who is ready to go:
"You tug my arm and say give up to lust, give up to lust,
Oh Heaven knows we'll soon be dust...
...I could have been wild and I could have been free,
But Nature played this trick on me.
She wants it now and she will not wait.
But she's too rough and I'm too delicate."

Wow I have a lot of issues.
Do Make It Obvious When I'm Doing Something Good
I'm like a smoke detector in bed, literally sensing every signal she's putting out. If something seems negative, I stop doing that move immediately. If she's acting like she likes it, then I keep doing it and I remember it. And talking about it helps too. If you tell a guy he did something good in bed, like any kind gesture, he will definitely remember it forever.
Don't Do Anything Too Long
Believe it or not, I've had BJs that last too long. After a while, my mind wanders...regardless of what we are doing. So, if you keep doing something for a while, it gets awkward and monotonous. It's not fun to have to tell a girl, "You have to stop this" so be vigilant (because I feel rude saying I don't like something, so I just suffer through it).
Do Be Fair with "Lazy" Positions
Sex is tiring, especially when you're in extended periods of strenuous positions. We all need a break. For me this break comes when I get to lie flat on the bottom. When I'm in the energetic "giving" positions, I put a lot of pressure on myself. I tell myself I can't slow down or stop or she'll be disappointed so I just (again) suffer through it. And trust me, I'm not in the best shape. Switch it up if someone seems tired.
Don't Get Too Kinky Too Fast
You have to pace yourself: Don't break out the bunny mascot and handcuffs two days after your first encounter, which happened to be missionary with the lights out.
Do Have Respect for Yourself, Your Partner, and Those Around You
You know when you're staying in a house on vacation with friends, there's always that couple that can't go a few days without sex, so it's totally awkward in the close quarters? People disrespect themselves through sex too: A video recently circled the Internet featuring two college students having sex on the floor of a pub bathroom in a deep puddle of beer-muck. You should have the foresight to care about how you both feel during and after the act. And don't make other people part of it nearby (although some people are into that).
Don't Give Me Any Idea How Great Your Ex Was in Bed
Please don't let me know that your ex was an "animal in bed," doing things I could never dream of trying. This is one of the cases where "what I don't know won't kill me" truly makes sense.
What do you think of my dos and dont's, and what are examples of dos and dont's in bed for you? Are they similar to mine?
So here’s a list of common sex etiquette mistakes that men make in the bedroom – they may be slight and unintentional, but most men are better off without these — ask your women!

Poor Hygiene-  You know she totally won’t be begging for more if you show up unshaved, haggardly and with a bad breath straight from hell. You really should take some time to groom yourself and clean yourself appropriately. If it’s a case of random, spontaneous sex thought, never hurts to excuse yourself for a minute or two and visit the bathroom to clean up!

Ripping Her Clothes-Oh we know – the way the movie stars do it, you may as well dream for it to be the stuff fantasies are made of. But it’s not. Not sexy at all. Or even practical. This ain’t no movies and someone’s got to sew those buttons back on. Some come however strong the passion, or the urge to rip – restrain.

Allowing Interruptions-Unless something or someone’s on fire, you’re better off not letting a telephone call interrupt you in the act. It’s just not good etiquettes, and not very flattering to the lady as well. There may be other unavoidable distractions like someone knocking on the door – in that case its best to wrap things up quickly before the mood is ruined.

Not Cuddling-Most women dread the post-coitus-no-cuddle-get-up-and-get-dressed-routine that most men seem to be hardwired into. It just leaves a woman feeling unwanted. So remember delivering the obligatory cuddle. Believe us; most ladies would love you for that.

Being Selfish-If you want to be known as a good lover, being selfish sexually is a big no. Granted it’s not always possible to be not selfish all the time, but ideally sex should be equally pleasurable for both the parties involved in the act.

Springing Fetishes On Her-If it’s a sexual preference out of the common order, it is best to ask before springing it onto your partner. Whether it is a foot fetish or S&M or any other sexual leaning, discussing it before her is best rather than whipping out the handcuffs out of the blue and freaking her out!

No Foreplay-Foreplay is as important to most women as sex is to most men. There, we have put it as pointedly as possible. And here’s another tip: foreplay doesn’t have to begin only once you have entered the bedroom; a good way to start the ‘act’ would be to point out to her how sexy she looks. Point we’re trying to make is: stimulating her in all possible ways you can before hitting the sack, best bedroom etiquette ever!

If you have any guidelines that you think are important, please feel free to email mail me at  I would love to hear them and share them with the world.

***This is in no way is an ad for sex.  These are suggestions for your personal life, not for office visits.

Episode 12: Sex Questions and Answers 

 Sex Questions and Answers
By Christie LaValley for Under the Covers on
***This is in no way is an ad for sex.  These are suggestions for your personal life, not for office visits.

Q: Is there anything you can do to change or increase your sex drive?
A: Experts say the answer lies not so much in what your sex drive is, but whether or not it has reached its potential. The level of desire is individual, but can also differ with each partner, and vary within a relationship, increasing or decreasing over periods of time.
Age is also a factor in sex drive, amongst men and women, and is usually due to a decline in sex hormones. Furthermore, there are a number of emotional and physical conditions, as well as medications like some anti-depressants, that can affect desire.
Physical problem can cause sex drive to decrease such as erection difficulties in men, or painful intercourse in women. However, after treatment is received normal levels desire usually increase. If emotions or chakra blockages are getting in the way, talking to a counselor or sex therapist or Reiki practitioner  can help. And sometimes, sex drive will recharge on its own, as your life changes.Maybe you just have not met the right partner yet.

Q: Are you ever “too old” to make love?
A: As long as both you and your partner are in good physical health, experts say both men and women can continue to have sex to any age. However, sex can become difficult due to the affects of aging and medical conditions that become more prevalent as we age.
Even if intercourse is not possible, remember that physical intimacy can take many forms, and that sometimes getting older really does mean getting wiser about the many ways in which partners can bring each other pleasure. 

Q: Can too much masturbation hurt your sex life?
A: As long as masturbation isn’t your whole sex life, and does not take precedence over intimate relationships with a partner, masturbate all you want. You do need to take into consideration how your partner feels about you masturbation habits and consider does this upset your partner?  Also important to consider: How much of your time do masturbation activities occupy and does it keep you from other things in your life, including having sex with a partner? If so, it can be problematic in many respects.  Masturbation should be pleasurable PART of your sex life. 
Masturbation is a great way for couples unable to have regular sex to be intimate and can be a nice change

Q: What is the definition of “sex addiction” -- and what does it entail?
A:   According to “Sexual addiction is best described as a progressive intimacy disorder characterized by compulsive sexual thoughts and acts. Like all addictions, its negative impact on the addict and on family members increases as the disorder progresses. Over time, the addict usually has to intensify the addictive behavior to achieve the same results.
For some sex addicts, behavior does not progress beyond compulsive masturbation or the extensive use of pornography or phone or computer sex services. For others, addiction can involve illegal activities such as exhibitionism, voyeurism, obscene phone calls, child molestation or rape.
Sex addicts do not necessarily become sex offenders. Moreover, not all sex offenders are sex addicts. Roughly 55 percent of convicted sex offenders can be considered sex addicts.”
Behaviors associated with sex addiction include: Compulsive masturbation; multiple extramarital affairs; anonymous sex partners or strings of one night stands;  consistent use of pornography; consistent need for phone or computer sex; continuous use of prostitutes; sexual exhibitionism (such as “flashing”); voyeurism (watching others have sex); stalking a sex partner. 

Q: Do aphrodisiacs really work? If so, which ones have the best track record? 
A: Since early ancient time,  various foods, plants, scents, drugs, and devices have been thought to have mystical powers of stimulating sexual desired.. Among the most legendary are oysters (they do contain lots of sperm-friendly zinc) and green M&M's, which has no basis in reality! The use of Spanish fly or cantharides which is made from dried beetle remains. It is works because It irritates the urogenital tract, causing the sex organs to become engorged with blood. Spanish fly is a poison that is also known to burn the mouth and throat, cause urinary infections and scarring, and sometimes death.
 According to Cosmopolitan, studies at Chicago's Smell and Taste Research Foundation found the smell of black licorice and doughnuts increased penile blood flow by 32%, while lavender and pumpkin pie boosted response to 40%. In women, vaginal blood flow was increased by smelling a combination of cucumbers and candy, while the smell of cherries, barbecue meat, and men’s colognes caused a decrease. Some researchers however, debate the integrity of these findings.
In animal studies a substance known as yohimbine, obtained from the bark of an African tree, had results that the FDA has called "promising." But the FDA maintains there is no conclusive evidence that this, or any aphrodisiac, works on people.

Q:  What causes erectile dysfunction? 
A:  According to there are many causes of erectile dysfunction. 
“Sometimes it's caused by a health condition. Other times, lifestyle plays a role. But blood flow is always important. If blood is prevented from properly flowing to the penis, it can lead to erectile dysfunction.
Sometimes, ED can be caused by a medical condition. Many conditions including diabetes, high cholesterol, and hardening of the arteries can affect blood flow in the body. And this can lead to ED. Also, depression can lead to ED.
Other times, it's caused by medications. Some medicines that men take for conditions like high blood pressure and depression can lead to ED.
Lifestyle factors can also play a part. For example, smoking can damage blood vessels. And it can lead to hardening of the arteries. This may prevent blood flow to the penis and can cause ED.”
Vaigra seems to have addressed these issues and one little blue pill could help.  In the east and in tantric beliefs it is thought that erectile dysfunction can be improved by having sex with the same woman for 10 days with her on top.  You should not worry about any outcome but to enjoy the woman trying to please you.  You are to just lay there and enjoy with no worries about your penis’ behavior.

Q: What is the average penis size?
A: A study conducted by Lifestyles Condom Co. shows that the average length of a male sex organ is 5.877 inches. Other reports, however, indicate that the average length of a penis is between 5.9 to 6.2 inches. Most of these reports don't have a large enough sample size to be statistically significant. Therefore, you can expect that the average penis size is between 5.8 and 6.2 inches.

 Rest assured that you really only need an average size penis to please the vagina. According to “The internal walls of the vagina itself do not have a great supply of nerve endings, thus are not very sensitive to touch. The outer one-third of the vagina, especially near the opening, contains nearly 90 percent of the vaginal nerve endings and therefore is much more sensitive to touch than the inner two-thirds of the vaginal barrel.”

Q: What is the most common cause of sex issue between couples
While they can take many forms, sex problems are defined as any physical or emotional issue that prevents a couple from achieving a mutually satisfying intimate relationship.

The most common for men include prostate problems, a decrease in the blood supply to the penis, nerve damage to the spinal cord, or a decrease in the hormone testosterone. In women common problems include a lack of desire caused by a decrease in the hormone estrogen, thyroid disorders and pain during intercourse caused by any number of vaginal problems, including a lack of lubrication.
Some couples also find that the use of certain drugs can also cause sexual problems. These include alcohol, nicotine, narcotics, stimulants, some blood pressure drugs, antihistamines, and certain antidepressant medications.

Q: What is the most common sexual condition affecting men?

A: Studies show it is premature ejaculation, which can affect up to 75% of men. Clinically it is defined as the release of the ejaculate from the penis either before intercourse can take place, or quickly after it starts, usually within less than 15 "thrusts." Almost every man will experience premature ejaculation at least once in their life,  however ,for some the problem will become chronic. A highly sensitive and easily stimulated nervous system, obsessive compulsive disorder, or sometimes a lack of control over the body's response to excitement are usually the roots of the problem.  The use of certain medications including some cold pills and stress can cause temporary problems.
Treatments for chronic premature ejaculation include the antidepressant medication clomipramine (Anafranil) taken 12 hours before sex, and use of a condom to help reduce sensation. Sometimes a prescription lidocaine cream can also help by reducing sensation, but that can also impact the partner.

Q: What causes sexual dysfunction in women?

A: Unlike their male counterparts  who require certain physiological events to have intercourse, women have no such restrictions. The most common reasons for sexual dysfunction with women  are often based in matters of desire, sexual arousal, or sometimes painful intercourse. Some women also report an inability to have an orgasm or experience pain when achieving one.
While a decrease in desire can be caused by many things, including a negative relationship with a partner, or other life stresses, physical causes are often traced to a decrease in the hormones estrogen and testosterone that occur during menopause. Not only can this decrease desire, it can also cause a decrease in vaginal lubrication making it more difficult for the sex organs to become stimulated and most likely causing intercourse to be painful.  Also, certain illnesses, such as a thyroid disorder or depression, can greatly impact a woman's desire. Theunfortunate  inability to achieve orgasm is seldom caused by a physical problem, but more often the result of inadequate stimulation by a woman's partner. Women often need lots of foreplay and enticing behavior prior to sexual intercourse.
Q: I'm horny when I have my period. Is it cool to have sex, or will I totally gross my guy out?

A: There is only one way to be sure how your man feels, ask him. If he's is willing, it is best to stick to man-on-top mode. Bleeding is often e lighter if you're lying down,"
While there are benefits to doing the deed during your time of the month like a heightened libido and reduced cramping, it is still very possible to get pregnant. Use of a condom is suggested since both partners are more apt to contract HIV at this time.

Q: My boyfriend ignores my nipples, I hate it.  I think turns me on just as much as playing with my clitoris. Does it?

 A: According to an article on,” psychologists at Rutgers University in the U.S. found that when women's nipples are stimulated the sensation travels to the same part of the brain as when their genitals are aroused. Brain scans of women who made themselves aroused showed that the nipples hit the same spot as the vagina and clitoris.

The research confirms for the first time what many women have experienced themselves - that their nipples can be an erogenous zone too.  The researchers asked 11 non-pregnant women between 23 and 56 to stimulate themselves while they lay inside a brain scanner.

The resulting images show the areas of the brain which were affected were like a 'cluster of grapes' in the medial paracentral lobule, which is in the middle and at the top of the brain.”  Which by the way is directly correlated to the crown chakra.


***This is in no way is an ad for sex.  These are suggestions for your personal life, not for office visits.  

Episode 11: Tantra Explained 

Tantra Explained
By Christie LaValley for Under the Covers on
***This is in no way is an ad for sex.  These are suggestions for your personal life, not for office visits.

       Since many of my clients who like Reiki and how their energies feel when brought into balance,  ask me about Tantra and its benefits, I decide compile the best of the information I could find.  Tantra is a lot like Reiki works with the energy  of our Chakras for to enlighten , liberate and  to expand our lives through the balance of universal life or love energy. However, with Tantra differs for there are two practitioners, instead of one practitioner and one client, the two are engaged in intimate or intimate sexual relations.  Like Reiki, to practice Tantra successfully, it is best to have a basic knowledge of your Chakra system and how it works.  The practice of Tantra shows you how to reclaim the sexual intimacy that is your birthright and through this most ancient of arts, you have the great opportunity to discover new joys of the erotic.  You will learn expand moments of sexual ecstasy and turn them into a lifetime of sexual bliss. At a time when the stresses, fears and distractions of daily life threaten so many relationships, the age-old practice of Tantra  might show you how to open your heart, your emotions , your sexuality, to improve your current relationship or to land the perfect relationship.
Tantra, born in India more than 6,000 years ago, emerged as a rebellion against organized religion, which held that sexuality should be rejected in order to reach enlightenment.  Sound familiar with Christianity over the last 2000 years. At the time, Tantra challenged the acetic beliefs of that time, claiming that sexuality was a doorway to the divine, and that even earthly pleasures such as eating, dancing and creative expression were sacred acts.
The word Tantra, itself, means "to manifest, to expand, to show and to weave."Tantras are a group of scriptures defining how to liberate yourself and to expand your consciousness. According to Wikipedia, the Tibetan Buddhist Tantric master Lama Thubten Yeshe stated:
     “...each one of us is a union of all universal energy. Everything that we need in order to be complete is within us right at this very moment. It is simply a matter of being able to recognize it. This is the tantric approach.[22    Yoga, belly dancing, singing, feasting and bathing are all seen as ways to enlighten yourself.”
      In this article we will discuss how with Tantra, Tantric Sex philosophies can be used to improve your sex life.  In this particular context of the scriptures, sex is thought to expand  the consciousness and to weave together the polarities of male (represented by the Hindu god, Shiva), and female (embodied by the Hindu goddess, Shakti), into a harmonious whole.  Becoming whole with your partner is a unique opportunity to become one for that moment in time.  Do remember it is best to live in your own energy, so being one is just glorious chance to show your love to your partner.
It is important to know that it is not necessary for couples to adopt the Tantric Gods or ways  of the Hindu  in order to benefit from the sexual wisdom of this ancient art.  Just the Tantric sexual practices  are enough to teach us how to prolong the act of love making and help us to utilize potent orgasmic energies to achieve a more enlightened life in general , but also give you a astounding  sex life.
      Like Reiki, which is the clearing of unneeded energies of our chakras with the replacement of good energy either by oneself, from a friend or stranger and is not a sexual act, but an act of love, Tantra is done with a lover in an intimate sexual act of love.  Both are known to have health enhancing benefits. One of our most powerful energies for creating health is Sexual energy and by using sexual energy consciously...we can tap into a true source of youth and vitality.  We may also fix problems that we thought would never be obtainable and worry us daily creating low self worth.
All sexual problems such as impotence, premature ejaculation, lack of libido, frigidity, self esteem and self worth problems and problems with self expression are related to the emotional issues associated with our sexuality.
      It has been stated in both Reiki teachings and in Tantric teachings that nearly all emotional and mental issues or disorders that exist are at least partly connected with our sexuality and or its repression. In trying rid our self of these energies or as you might call them stresses, we seek many temporary fixes like drugs, herbs or tonics but none of these are cures. The only possible cure is a clearing of the emotional and energetic blockages that are the primary cause for sexual problems as well as other emotional issues. To do this we must begin to cultivate sexual energy, be determined to stop its loss and learn to circulate it throughout the body.
How Is Tantric Sex Unique?
To understand where you sit in relations to tantric practice? Ask yourself a few questions?
1.      Sex is:  a) a way of transforming yourself  b) recreational
2.      Sex is :  a) liberating b) a de-stressor
3.      Sex is : a) ecstasy   b) how you achieve orgasm
      Since this article is to educate those with western belief of what Tantric sex is, you have most likely answered all questions with a b answer.  If you answered them with an A answer you already are practicing some form of tantric practice in your love making rituals. Here in the West, we sometimes view sex as a source of recreation rather than a means of transformation. The goal may be to reach orgasm rather than to pleasure our lover or to connect with him or her more fully. The true essence of Tantric Sex is in transforming our energy body which in turn raises the vibration of the physical body making us more aware of our true being. This is a beautiful thing is you can do with your partner and by doing it together you are sharing cosmic consciousness with your partner physical body’s energies, but also with their subtle bodies’ energies.
     With a raise in vibration of the physical body, it becomes extremely healthy and thoroughly cleanses all of the organs, glands and the central nervous system. It is also believed with the gradual clearing and raising of vibration the practitioner is cleared of negative conditioning from the past. It is also believed that growing up in the confusing  societies here on earth has divorced people from their sexuality, ultimately, leaving them with many emotional traumas. Due to this trauma, we are cut off from an infinite source of power, creativity and expression.
Due to our Sexual and emotional blockages we cannot cultivate sexual energy!
       It is well  known that the ordinary male must ejaculate somewhat often or he will become frustrated, emotionally irritable and may have little control over his mind. He may become totally preoccupied with sex. It is different for the female. Since the female gradually builds sexual energy through the monthly cycle, towards the end of the month, just before menstruation a female will become irritable, very emotional and even endure painful physical symptoms. So the unfortunate consequences of built up sexual energy are basically the same for males and females. We become frustrated and irritable. We must note that the way in which  we dispell the energy is quite  different. The female will evacuate her built up energy through menstruation and the male will evacuate his through ejaculation.
      Now, the  basic idea of Tantra is the exchanging sexual energy with your partner. Circulating and blending it throughout each other’s bodies simply cannot be compared with ordinary orgasm.  It is extremely mystical and very powerful. During typical orgasm, a small amount of sexual energy is built up and then released from the testicles in men and with the ovaries in women, into the genitals. This release of built up energy is where the orgasmic feelings come from.  The small amount of sexual energy that causes these feelings are not be enough to create a full body orgasm
The feeling of orgasm is in fact the feeling of sexual energy being released into areas of the body where there are many nerve endings.

       To obtain a full body orgasm, the entire meridian system must be cleared and the vibration of the energy body must be raised.  In Tantra, this is done through the practice of cultivation and circulation of sexual energy.  Learning this will take time and blockages around the genital region will slowly be cleared as you continue to practice. Eventually, you will be able to build and store much more sexual energy. Later, the stores of sexual energy can then be released into the meridian system during sex and cause some very intense full body orgasms that can last a very long time, and believe it or not with no ejaculation.
     Normal orgasm for females does not ever result in a large scale loss of sexual energy. This is why women are capable of having longer lasting orgasms than men, multiple orgasms or even body orgasms. The female’s orgasm is simply sexual energy being released from the ovaries, usually into the genital area, but not leaving the body. Some women who are mor liberated about their sex life already know how to pull their sexual energy up to achieve full body orgasm.
      However, for the male sperm is made up of sexual energy, so as they are released the sexual energy is released with them.  Sexual energy is  a person’s essence and is known as Jing.  Men lose Jing every time they ejaculate.  Losing one’s essence is ultimately loss of life energy.
Beginning Tantric Sex Techniques
     With standard American sex there is a distinct beginning and ending, with a climax somewhere in between. The average duration of an act of sex is about 10 to 15 minutes. Unfortunately, a women can take about 20 minutes just to reach full arousal. So a short stint of  a sexual experience can be deeply unsatisfying to many women.
      In the Tantric model, the sexual experience is seen as a beautiful dance that has no beginning or end.  There is no goal like ejaculation or ordinary orgasm. It is only about the present moment of being a blessed union of sexual energy with love as its guide . It is for this reason, lovemaking is meditative, expressive and intimate experience in Tantric practices. Tantra teaches lovers how to extend the peak of their sexual ecstasy so that both women and men can experience several orgasms in one single sexual encounter.
        Some leading teachers of Tantra suggest that even men who experience premature ejaculation can learn how to extend orgasm, and, with practice, they will even enjoy multiple orgasms. Just to throw facts out, 75% of men suffer from premature ejaculation.  To learn more about premature ejaculation and fixes for it check our blog Sex Questions.
       The following exercises are example of ways that will help you reconnect with your body and with your partner in a remarkably profound way. As you move through these steps, do not focus on intercourse as the ultimate goal, try instead to simply enjoy.  Take turns at giving and receiving pleasure using gentle touch and loving words.
     Communication with your lover is the key to discovering what he or she finds most arousing. Try to spend several weeks practicing the Tantric Intimacy Exercises without necessarily engaging in intercourse.  I know this will be hard for some, but this is a great practice for those trying to shed or release sexual guilt, for this exercise builds trust and reawakens sexual desire with no pressure to "go all the way!

Welcoming Love - Opening the Heart Chakra

 First and foremost, you must decide to make time love and sex. Many of us, due to fears of being hurt again, build up walls or establish routines that limit our time spent thinking about sex. One must drop the walls and open the Heart Chakra to accept intimacy.  Make time for each other every week, by planning a sexual rendezvous with your lover. Plan at least an hour or more of uninterrupted time to be together.  In order to reap the benefits of Tantra, your relationship should be top priority.
Create  a sacred place. It does not matter where you decide to spend your hour together as long as you make that space inviting and relaxing.  Take the time to think about what you and your lover need or might desire and make sure it is present.  That way you will not need to stop to find what you need.  Set the stage for love by filling the space with things that will invoke the senses like plush blankets and pillows, candles, fresh flowers, erotic art, finger foods, erotic music and tantalizing aromas. A well set stage call for a fantastic performance.
 Become a God or Goddess by dressing provocatively. Take the time to look your best.  Not only will you feel better about yourself, but your confidence will glow and excite your partner.

Tantric Rituals

Use rituals to help develop intimacy. Begin your sexual encounter with a ritual.  Tantric beliefs say eating or singing or dancing are other forms of enlightenment.   Get a head start and try adding this to your journey. It could something as simple as feeding each other delicious foods or sharing a glass of wine while laying naked surrounded by plush pillows. You could try bathing together. Try anything that helps you to attune to each other.
Bathing is great ritual, take time to wash each other with loving care. Not only does water relaxes the body and is a symbol of sexuality, but in eastern beliefs it helps bring the Sacral- the sexual chakra into alignment. 
       Remember that touch is very important  factor to opening the heart chakra of your lover.  Though, they might have tried to open the Heart Chakra on their own by planning the sexual rendezvous, gently massaging each other is an excellent way to finish opening the heart and to fuse your energies.  Remember these are just recommendation, everyone is different, but the key here is to work on developing new intimacy skills. The most important part of the ritual is to learn to communicate by sharing and helping your  partner feel loved and cherished.
     It has been suggested that in order to fully focus on each other (rather than on the goal of sex), some lovers experiment with various intimate rituals for several weeks before moving on to the next steps or engaging in intercourse.  Though this might be difficult, this is a wonderful way to strengthen the bonds of love and ignite passion.
 The Benefit of Breath
     "The only time we ever think about breathing is when we have trouble doing it, yet conscious breathing can be a powerful aid in sexual growth," according to sex therapist Marty Klein, Ph.D. of Palo Alto, California. Breathing exercises also quiet the mind and help you focus on each other.
      Though it might feel awkward at first try this exercise: Sit quietly in your sacred place, cross-legged, facing each other. Rest your hands on your knees with your palms facing up (this helps you to not feel your knees with your hands, but allows you to take in energy.  Gaze into your lover's eyes and take soft, but deep breaths. Keep your eyes open, gazing beyond the eyes, into your partner’s soul. Sustained eye contact is essential for building intimacy.
      Once you become comfortable with the first part and can keep eye contact, move your focus to paying attention to your breathing. Begin to breathe at the same pace, bringing air slowly in through your nose and exhaling through your mouth. Remember to maintain eye contact while you breathe together. Practice this exercise until you can sustain eye contact and harmonized breathing for about 10 minutes. You will feel high from the extra oxygen, and you will be in tune with your lover’s energy.  Most common sexual encounters only last 15 and it takes a woman 20 minutes to relax enough to orgasm.  Spending this time helps bring the oxygen to the brain which is needed for female ecstasy.
         Now you are ready to  move to erotic touch
The Art of Erotic Touch
Fully appreciate your partner with erotic touch. Continue to maintain eye contact, don't worry about keeping your breath synchronized, just remember to keep breathing deeply. Guide your partner as you take turns stimulating each other. Describe to each other exactly how you would like to be touched. This most pleasurable practice will help you become better lovers. Make requests in a clear and loving manner. Make sure to thank your lover and let him or her know with words or sounds that you are enjoying this sensual touch.
     Once you become comfortable with each others touch, you may wish to try other objects that   excite you and your partner—a feather, vibrator, massage oil, blindfold, soft fabric, erotica and loving notes to each other are just a few ideas. As you learn to deeply pleasure each other, don't be shy about asking for something different. This is your time for appreciation, experimentation and for taking responsibility for your own fulfillment by asking for what you want.
 From here, you may wish to embark on your joined erotic journey. Create amorous adventures together, exploring new and creative ways to awaken each other's bodies and minds. Then, you will be ready for Tantric lovemaking

Basic Tantric Sex Techniques

      The Tantric tradition emphasizes on getting prepared for lovemaking.  Sharing erotic rituals such as those described above focus on exchanging pleasures, awakening the senses and allowing couples to communicate on the deepest physical and emotional levels.  Through communication you are creating the optimal conditions for Tantric lovemaking.
     As you experiment with Tantric techniques, don't worry whether you are doing something right or wrong. This is a stage for learning and experiencing. Ultimately, it is about being in the moment with your lover and your pleasure is what matters most. As you transition into sexual part, the main idea is to maintain a state of sexual ecstasy for as long as possible. Do not shoot for the orgasm or worry about ejaculation. Tantric lovemaking is not result-oriented, but rather, timeless and unstructured.
Maintain a deep level of intimacy and keep it slow. A long, slow build helps men control orgasm and piques women's arousal. According to Tantric teacher, Robert Frey, the longer you linger in this process of building energy, the longer men can resist ejaculation. During this time, focus on each other and if your thoughts should wander, gently bring your attention back to the present, concentrating on your lover and the magic of the moment at hand. Continue to gaze into each other's eyes as much as possible.  This is a good time for light kisses and whispering words of love and encouragement.
Bring your attention back to your breath. Resist the urge to breathe quickly. Quick breathing creates arousal, speeding you toward orgasm. Instead, take long, slow, deep breaths from the belly, exhaling slowly. You may match your breath to that of your partner, or try breathing alternately—as you inhale, your partner exhales. This moves energy back and forth and connects you to your lover.
Vary your positions Different sex positions add to sexual pleasure and help balance male and female energies. Releasing each other from gender roles, lovers are free to engage in deeper, more intimate sex.  Allowing both lovers to be passive and aggressive, men realize their sexual potential through surrender, by being soft and open, gentle and vulnerable.  The Women, learns that she too, can direct and initiate. As you experiment with different positions, some male-dominant, some female-dominant. Take time to  explore your capacity to be strong and gentle, generous and receptive.

Freeing Multiple Orgasms for Men and Women

      Yes, it is true. A man can have multiple orgasms. In Tantric sex, there is a focus on the difference between the experiences of orgasm and ejaculation. Although they often happen at the same time, men are quite capable of having orgasms without ejaculating. Learning ejaculatory control is what makes it possible for Tantric lovers to capture and extend the energy of orgasm. You can learn more about this on your own or with a lover, buy reading my blog about multiple male orgasm.
This does not mean that you are never to ejaculate, but that you can control your climax. The essence, say Tantric experts, is to catch a wave of energy and to surf the edge without going over.
Relax and put it all together. Although it sounds impossible, it's important for men to stay relaxed during high states of arousal. If you feel the undulations of ejaculation, take a slow, deep breath and stop making love long enough for your arousal to subside. Relax and try to direct energy from your penis up through your body.  It is with this action that the rest of the chakra can be cleansed and healed.
      By experimenting, you will discover how much "time out" you individually require before catching the next wave. The idea is to allow yourself enough time for the intensity to subside, but not so much that you lose your erection. Since these techniques take practice, expect a few "wipe outs" or failures before you achieve mastery.
    It is often said that a woman's most powerful sex organ lies between her ears. I can attest to that. Since desire can be easily short-circuited by fear, guilt, stress and a host of other distracting thoughts, women often need to concentrate on the feelings of sex, rather than thinking when making love. Taking breaks to pleasure each other, manually and orally, is a great way to ward off any lingering thoughts or diversions and to coax one or more orgasms.
Most women require stimulation of the clitoris and labia (the inner lips surrounding the clitoris) during sex to reach orgasm. Prolonged clitoral touch is often the key to sexual ecstasy for women. Communication is the only way to guide your lover, showing your partner how to stroke you just right.
The Grafenberg Spot (G-spot) is referred to in Tantra as the "sacred spot." For Most women it is located about two to three inches up on the front side of the vaginal channel. When your lover is aroused, slip a finger into her vagina allowing your fingertip to brush against the inner wall. The G-spot is about the size of a pea or a quarter depending on the female with a slightly rippled texture. For some women, gentle stimulation cannot only induce powerful orgasms, but can even cause female ejaculation. However, take care not to over-stimulate this sensitive spot.  Women are not used to expelling sexual energy.
Relax and bring it together.  Remembering to breathe deeply and to go slow while bringing the energy up through the rest of your body, not only does it store the sacred energy but will help you use it to heal the other chakras, your relationships and how you feel about life..
       I hope you have found this information useful to helping you continue to keep your Chakras in balance and to find new ways to heal yourself with the help of your loved one.  If you do not have a loved one yet, knowing this information might bring that loved one to you faster. 
I am here to help you stay in check till then, just remember Reiki is healing as an act of love, not sexual act of love.

Information for this article was taken from the following links. For more on this subject, visit the links

***This is in no way is an ad for sex.  These are suggestions for your personal life, not for office visits. 
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